Marriage 101

As I mentioned in my last post I have been married 20 years, well almost 20. I have been with my husband for over 25 years, and we have known each other our entire lives. You would think that this would make marriage easy for us, but you would be wrong.

Marriage is not easy. I suppose that anything that is really worth it is not easy. I just wish sometimes it wasn't so difficult. Our biggest problem is that we are so very different. It is hard for me to think of anything we have in common other than our children and the fact that we grew up together. We have different likes and opinions. When I was young and naive I thought this would add spice to our marriage, but I have come to realize that it doesn't. Now that the kids have come along, it just makes things worse.

For the most part I am OK with our marriage. Happy even. But on other days, like yesterday, I am not so happy and think about what it would be like if we were not married. I know that all the experts say you shouldn't stay together just for the kids, but having come from a broken home myself, I do not want to subject my kids to that. I KNOW that things would be worse for them so divorce is not an option.

I really don't know how we got here. We were happy once, but lately it seems everything is a fight. Of course our friends would never know. To them we look like the perfect family. Does that even exist? Is this such a thing? I use to think so, but now I am not so sure. It seems that my friends and colleagues do not have the fairy tale marriage either. Maybe I am just hanging out the the wrong crowd. My husband keeps telling me that we are better than most. Maybe he is right. I guess time will tell.