Changing Shapes

I don't know how I have managed it, but I have put on 20 lbs and there seems to be no end in sight. I just don't seem to have the will power I once had. I have never been a "skinny" girl, but lately I would say I have slipped over into the obese category. I can't stand this about myself, and I am sickened every time I see myself in the mirror or put on clothes. To make matters worse, I know that the weight is affecting my health. I am borderline diabetic. I just don't know what it is going to take to shake me out of this. I start a new diet every Monday. Why can't I just get over it? I know that I use food in many ways. I eat when I am stressed (lots of stress lately). I eat to celebrate. I eat when I am not hungry. I eat because I like the taste. I just disgust myself. I am sorry that this post is such a downer. I just need to vent. Do normal (ie. not fat) people have these problems with food? How do you handle it?